Poetry ~ Waka
sudden winter thaw
birds chirp on bare branches
dazed and confused
sudden winter thaw
Mother Nature’s idea
of a bad joke
birds chirp on bare branches
searching from above
nothing to eat
dazed and confused
jewelled icicles take in the sun
dripping off branches
©Tournesol’18/01/12
Daily moments mid-season change January 12 2018 Troiku
Day 4 of snow today but on the grrreat side, it is th warmest it has been in 2 weeks reaching a balmy minus 4 C!! I had to do some errands today and waiting for the winds to calm down. They said it was supposed to stop at 2pm.but by 4pm.it was still snowing. I was so thrilled when I got outside, because the snow was nice and immaculate and powdery. The snow ploough had cleared up the sidewalk in the morning, so it was not too bad but on my return it had stopped snowing and I was following the sidewalk plough.
I love walking in the snow after a blizzard. It was so calm and mild outside. I thought of waiting for the bus when I finished my errands with two heavy bags but I figured that walking was healthier even if I walk slowly. I have spent two weeks on my back most of the time nursing my sinuses but mostly I was so darn exhausted.
Coming back to my walk, it reminded me of a dear late friend who used to walk at night with me for hours. We would tuck our kids to bed, our hubbies too and then meet after 10 or 11 at night and walk and talk. I miss her so dearly. She was my next door neighbour I met when we moved to Chambly January 7th 1982. My daughter was just one and my son was 4. It was their father’s birthday too. I was never happier moving out of the country where the kids were born and into a small suburban town. I had been so lonely at the other place. Here in Chambly, all the children were outside playing speaking French or English and moms were outside chatting and walking. During snow storms, everyone was out. Dads shovelling and chatting with a neighbour or two for a break; children making forts and moms watching them and chatting with neighbours. Gosh! We were all healthy!! [chuckling to myself now]
I was thinking of Janet, my old neighbour and dear friend walking back home tonight. I have never had a friend like her since. We would call each other late at night if we could not sleep and let the phone ring one ring. That was the signal who was calling not to disturb or wake up anyone. I suppose today we might have texted but we did not have cell phones then. Then we would meet up and drink coffee and me sweet tea until 3 or 4 in the morning. She made me a better person and mother in so many ways.
So back to the weather, well, apparently we have had such cold weather from minus 25 to minus 40 C and they say we broke a record for being the coldest for so many consecutive days in 164 years!! Wow!
Thanks to Linda Hill for her prompt in Stream of Consciousness Saturday (SoCS): prompt “eco” that coaxed me to write something since I have not had the energy, although I had the inspiration, to write in the past week. And once again, wishing you all a happy new year filled with much love. If you have love in your heart, you are wealthy and successful!.
Memories
Winters long ago
Soulmates
Memories
Sauntering
Lifting my spirit
Winters long ago
Building snow forts all day long
Snow angels rest
Soulmates
Walking after a snowstorm
Crunch underfoot
(c)Tournesol’ 18-01-08
Daily Moments – January 8, 2018 – memories (troibun)
last few chapters
time to slow down
nearing the end
like saying adieu
to special new friends
© Tournesol’18/01/04
Daily moments jan 4/18. Ending a novel
Cold snap since last year
Persistent
Adding fresh snow
Cold snap since last year
Keeping the country captive
Prisoners of our homes
Persistent
Prayers for the bitter
Compassion comes first
Adding fresh show
Adorning
the cedar hedge
(c) Tournesol’18-01-03
Pearly skies
Angel dust falling softly
On my nose
Pearly skies here
Starlit skies over there
In Kerala
Angel dust falling softly
Teasing mister squirrel
On my balcony
On my nose
Feel the pressures
Winter cold
©Tournesol’18-01-02
Daily moments Jan 2/18. Angel dust (troiku)
I am not much for resolutions since it makes me feel locked in a wish to change a behaviour and when you feel forced, well, it’s like stubborn toddler in me resurfaces and I want to stomp my feet and say NO!!! I don’t want to, so there! And since I’m an adult, NO ONE can send me to my room, right?
However, as I age I feel my solitude, time to think and meditate and talk to myself for hours, days, weeks…I find myself rereading old wise words from yellowed pages of my books. Buddhist thought making more and more sense that I find myself wanting to try. I read over a list of 7 ways to overcome difficult times and posted it in on last journal of 2017 and it got me thinking.
I have had time to think a lot lately. Since December 22nd, I have worked one day and Christmas I went out for our family dinner…That is about what sums up my time off work. I had planned a trip and booked a train to see family for New Year’s in Toronto but my health was so so and did not feel it was right to visit people nursing a cold that would probably get much worse if I did not just rest in my own bed under very warm duvet cover in this crazy cold weather we are having in Quebec at -25 C most days. So I have had a lot of time to think. I have not been writing as much lately either. I seem to think too much and my thoughts get stuck in a dark whirlwind of negativity that it depresses me. My muse is not strong enough to weather that, so I escape by binging on Netflix. I try to read but it takes so much energy to concentrate on any book even if it is great!! This week, thankfully, I started reading The House Without Windows by Nadia Hashimi and finally, I am captivated. It has been months that I have been captivated like that and it feels so good. Granted the book is not a happy story but it is real, intense and about women and in this particular story it takes place in Afghanistan. I fell in l love with stories of Afghanistan and what it was like before wars and takeovers with a novel, A Thousand Splendid Suns by Khaled Hosseini. I read his Kite Runner after but that first novel just made want to know more.
I wrote my first poem (troiku) of the year today as well. And writing this feels hopeful that perhaps the storm in my mind is dying down or simmering at least and not taking over of my every thought which influences my actions. I feel hopeful.
Now, the resolution I had been thinking of for the past three days is to take each day as if it is the first day of the new year. You know how some people like to take the first day of the year as happy and positive? Well, I want to be mindful of today…each moment and tomorrow is not here but I hope to wake up and just feel that moment when I open my eyes, I stretch and get up. That moment I pet my cat and give her her food. I want to be more mindful each new day this year. Just like the moments I walk to work and chanting my mantra, noticing the tree branches move slightly and I imagine they are praying too! I want to be mindful like those moments as many minutes in the day and hold my love and compassion in my heart and with each movement. Happy New Year everyone!
For the first time
Looking out the frozen window
A new year
For the first time
Seeing sunlight
My eyes still shut
Looking out the frozen window
Cold snap goes on and on
Since last year
A new year
Looks like yesterday
Different attitude
©️Tournesol’2018/01/01
Written for Linda’s Friday Reminder of Stream of Consciousness Saturday.
December 26, 2017
Family gathered last night for dinner. Was it out of tradition or duty more than yearnings? Some with childlike passion and wonder, some giddy with holiday excitement and one with a sharp tongue dripping with masked humour hurting the target who’s left screaming silently with a heavy heart.
Where has love gone
Forgiveness and bygones…lost
Tales of yesterday
December 27, 2017
Honey, it’s cold outside at minus 19 C with the wind chill feels like minus 27C. Each day since Christmas it gets colder. Nothing to talk about except the weather. She sits in her mother’s rocker with the paisley covered cushions; she tries to write but nothing feels right and certainly nothing filled with holiday cheer. She thought of journaling but same difference, grey tones mixed with dark notions not fitting for this time of year.
White landscapes
A winter wonderland
Outside her window
Lethargy filled days catching up with much needed rest. Sleeping, reading, daydreaming, weeping and watching movies filled her days. Whenever she tried to write, only the pain resurfaced, and so she escaped in her dreams and her stories on the screen.
Cutting the current
In her brain
she finds relief
A winter wonderland
Outside her window
December 29, 2017
Knits her thoughts
wrapped in melancholy
she waits
knits her thoughts
dropping stitches one by one
a new year
wrapped in melancholy
masking old wounds
and forgiveness
she waits
tic toc tic toc
countdown to midnight
December 30th. 2017
Time freezes
Subzero temperatures
For awhile
Time freezes.
Midnight revellers
Numbed with champagne
Subzero temperatures
memories
In perpetuity
For awhile
Until twenty eighteen
A new chapter
(c) Tournesol’17-12-30
Daily Moments December 26th to December 30, 2017
After snowstorms
brisk walks on fresh fallen snow
Renewed peace
After snowstorms
rumbling
Of snow ploughs
Brisk walks on fresh fallen snow
Fluffy and white
Like icing sugar
Renewed peace
Lying on their backs
Making snow angels
(c)Tournesol’17-12-27
Tournesol dans un Jardin 